Don't Forget Your Shield!

Do you sometimes feel inadequate as a parent?  If so, you’re not alone. In today’s world, MANY parents feel this way. Parents have a limited amount of time to develop their child into what is hopefully an adult that possesses solid character and respectable values. Its easy to get discouraged in this process, believing  that you may be one of the few positive influences against a world of negative influence. Unfortunately, these feelings are justified. The paragraphs below are the first of many tools on this site to  assist  you in combating the world’s negative influences and help your child to be a kid that makes good choices and exhibit behaviors that you can be proud of.

Chapter One in my book is entitled, “Showing Love For Others”. The chapter provides a short story for kids that illustrates the advantages of “showing love for others” in their everyday life. Chapter One ends with instruction and suggestions on improving one’s ability to show love on a regular basis.

As a parent, it’s important that you have a “loving home,” meaning that you show your child how to “love others” through your own example. Your kids watch you closely, maybe closer than you realize. The truth is that your actions carry more weight in determining your child’s behavior than your words, much like the old saying “Actions speak louder than words”. In the upcoming years, your child will have numerous opportunities to assess YOUR behavior. They will study your communication style, attitudes, beliefs, values, etc. concerning how you treat/relate to your spouse… and everyone else. In my opinion, this will have the SECOND most  impact on  your child, determing whether they will be a loving and caring person that often places the needs of others ahead of their own wants.

The MOST effective way to help your child develop into a loving person is for YOU to regularly take steps to show love DIRECTLY to your children. This is to be done primarily through your actions —– always putting your child first, making sure that your ACTIONS clearly show how much you love them.

Also, start increasing awareness of communication patterns that you have with your children.  Do you regularly carry an overall positive and uplifting “theme” or do you  to always seem to be showing anger and/or negativity? As a parent, it’s easy to fall into patterns of expressing displeasure over your child’s behavior or spend long periods of time in a “correcting mode”(I know this happens to me more than I’d like to admit). Although the latter is a necessary part of parenting, make sure that there’s a healthy mix of positive/complimentary statements and “I love you’s” each day.

MOVING FORWARD

1.  This week, let your child choose an activity that they would like to do with you. During the activity, make it ALL about them(no phone calls, texting,etc.).  At some point during the activity, make a point of letting your child know how important they are to you.

2. This week,  add some type of volunteer work or selfless act to your schedule. This could be anything from visiting a nursing home to preparing a meal for a less fortunate family. Include your child in this and explain the importance of  “showing love for others”.

3.  This week, pray specifically for the ability to regularly “show love for others” and the drive necessary to be a consistent positive influence on your children through the words that you choose and your daily actions.

Remember, the world that we live in is continuously bombarding your child with messages that reinforce self-centered and selfish behaviors. It’s up to YOU as a parent to combat the negative influences of the world and protect your child. If you don’t act, the world may have more say over how your child  develops than you do! Act now.